


The Real Bipper

by Zinthr



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Alternate Weirdmageddon, Animal Death, Bill is an evil fuck, Dark!Dipper, Demons, Disturbing, Existential Angst, Existential Crisis, I am a horrible author, Mabel is too good for this world too pure, Mind Meld, Mindfuck, Other, Possible future ships - Freeform, Rating May Change, Self-Harm, Spoilers - Weirdmageddon Part I, This is going to get pretty dark guys, character death tag ay come into play in future chapters, demon!dipper, ignore the sucky title it may change, poetic in a way, prose, so much exposition, this fic is a mess and i am sorry, this gets really descriptiv-y and i am apologising now, will prbably be depressing at one point just a warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-04
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2018-05-04 20:42:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5347871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zinthr/pseuds/Zinthr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a last ditch effort to save Gravity Falls, Stanford creates a containment Ray that /should/ lock Bill into a bubble that he won't be able to get out of. </p><p>Should is the key word though. They have to try it, having no idea if it will work. </p><p>It does work- in a way. Instead of locking Bill in a bubble, it instead traps him inside of the closest person - Dipper. The two fuse into one and things only get stranger from there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Great yet Horrible

**Author's Note:**

> ** BE SURE TO READ THE SUMMARY **  
> hello yes i am a very shitty author that was too lazy to write the 'before', so the summary is needed to make sense of this haha. 
> 
> Also this entire story is basically just one giant existential crisis.

Dipper tried to scream. He tried to gasp. No matter what he did, he just couldn't move. He started to panic, desperately trying to move, to feel his limbs, to feel anything other than this searing, sharp pain that seemed to permitted his entire body. 

Well, his entire being. He didn't really feel like he had a body anymore. He had no real senses, only a vague perspective of the world around him. It was painful to attempt to focus on anything. 

He could hear shouting, somewhere behind him. It sounded quiet, though. Far away. He was seeing the world in shades of grey, only two colors visible in the blurry, confusing world - the bright red of his blood spraying in front of him, and the neon yellow of some glowing liquid spraying alongside of it. 

Eventually, he felt a bit more solid. Still in pain, still with no real ‘feeling’, but a bit less air-like. A little bit more corporeal. It felt...ethereal. It felt powerful. 

And all of a sudden, his senses came flooding back. But suddenly there was too much of everything. Colors were ridiculously bright, he could see every little detail, hear every little sound - even the smells were ten-fold, immediately making him nauseous. 

Dipper tried to walk - he tried to yell for help. He vaguely felt himself hit the ground. He was convulsing and spasming, he could feel bile rising in his throat - and then he blacked out. 

\---- ---- ---- ---- ---- ---- ----

It was gruesome and horrible, yes, but it was also mystifying. Stanford stood frozen In shock as he watched the scene unfold. As soon as the containment gun had shot, Bill and Dipper had been pulled towards each other, their bodies violently disassembling. They quickly became a swirling mass of yellow and red liquid, edged by occasional bits of skin, bone and brick. 

The vortex swirled faster and faster before it seemingly imploded upon itself, shrinking down into impossibly smaller sizes until it seemed to stop existing at all. For a moment, Stanford though this was it - Bill was gone for good, but had taken Dipper with him. He felt an emptiness inside. 

And then it all came back. It swelled and pulsed and became a rainbow of colors, shaping itself into the form of a human. It wasn't Dippers form, though - it was taller, less stringy. From what Ford could see from the silhouette alone, it seemed to be older than Dipper, yet wearing a hat he same shape.

The swirling colors darkened into black - the only color that remained was a white pine tree on the hat, and a yellow triangle where one eye might be. 

The being - Ford wasn't sure whether it was Dipper, Bill, or some kind of godforsaken mix of the two - floated in place for awhile. It's arms were trenches out to the sides, fingers parted and pointing skyward. It’s outline became slowly more defined, white lines on the inside of the black form. It's head was tilted upwards, mouth slightly open, thin streaks of yellow smoke lifting from between its lips. 

It began to grow, albeit only slightly - it formed what seemed to be pants, and then a long-sleeved shirt with a tailcoat back. The growing became more pronounced in one leg, mediate a long whip-like tail with an arrow-tip separated from the rest of the form. 

The same happened on the back of the figure, two large draconic wings separating from the body and flaring outwards. The top of the figures’ head bulged as well, separating into two large horns, curling over the back of it’s head. 

 

Finally, the figure finished its metamorphosis. It slowly moved downwards until its feet touched the blood-stained ground, and for the first time, it stood. 

Ford watched in equal parts awe and horror as the being slowly began to take a step forward. It did not make it very far before falling into its knees. 

The triangle on it's face faded away. It opened its previously non-existent eyes - one yellow, one white - and stared directly at Stanford. And, in a voice nearly identical to Dippers, it spoke. 

“Help...me…” It's voice was a bit deeper, more like what a seventeen year old Dipper might sound like. It carried the weight of someone far older, though. It sounded dry; cracked and tired. It sounded like it was meant be a yell, but could only be a hoarse whisper. It sounded pained. 

The form suddenly solidified, gaining color and physical form. 

It looked, for the most part, like an older Dipper. It's hair was in a different style, but the same chocolate brown color - aside from the blonde tips. The mouth - which still hung open - was filled with large, sharp teeth and a split, snake-like tongue. 

It had slightly grey-tinted skin, just a bit darker than Dipper’s. The wings and tail were based in a deep grey, with a golden yellow for the leather and the arrow-tip. The horns were pitch black, as was the hat that so closely resembled Dippers’ own. The white pine tree was still there. 

The being’s body fell forward. It began to convulse on the ground, as if it was having a seizure. Bloody looking bile dribbled from its mouth. 

Ford was spurred into action, unable to let lie and suffer - Dipper was in there, he had to be! - and ran forward. 

By the time he reached it, it had stopped moving. He kneeled by its side, checking for a pulse - blacked out, but still alive. He heaved a sigh of relief, and took the moment of stillness to look more closely at its face. 

Stanford brushed the hair away from its forehead. Yes, the Little Dipper was still there - good. He smiled, but it didn't last long as an unease began to set in. There was something else he had to check…

The eye which had held a triangle mark. He hesitated for a moment, before pushing the lid open. It was...just as he feared. The eye was all yellow, with a dark grey-green slit for a pupil. He checked the other eye, but thankfully, it was normal. Just a plain brown eye. 

Well, at least with Bill ‘gone’, all the demons had started flooding back through the dimensional rift, Stanford thought. He supposed he’d have to take care of that once he got Dipper...Bill…? Bipper…? Once he got Bipper home. 

He really hoped that Stan was at the shack...


	2. Starting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was a start.

It was dark when he woke up. Before he even opened his eyes, he was registering things about the room - its basic shape, the way it smelled, that he was on a bed - semi-comfortable, very familiar, probably Dipper’s bed - that he had wings crushed up behind, that there was a tail between his legs, and that there was another person with him. He smiled, just slightly, as he identified them. He would know that smell anywhere. 

Mabel, his little shooting star, was asleep in a chair next to his bed, her top half slumped onto the covers. She was snoring just slightly, and she smelled like she had been crying. 

He allowed his eyes to slip open, hissing quietly at the sensory assault. It was dark, but he could make out every line in the wood ceiling. He looked at the less offending blanket on the bed as he, slowly, began to sit up. His body hurt all over. 

He looked over, seeing a messy mop of brown hair next to him. He started to reach over to run a hand through it, but stopped when he noticed the sharp black claws on his hand. He gave a quiet sigh and instead patted Mabel’s head. She made a soft noise in her sleep. 

He never realized just how small she was before. 

“Mabel.” He said, and his voice surprised him. He...he wasn't entirely sure what kind of voice he was expecting, but it wasn't that. “Hey, Mabel.” He tried again, a little louder. 

“...Dipper…?” Mabel murmured quietly, one hand coming up to rub at her eye as she sat up. He smiled at her, still squinting. Her eyes suddenly widened, and she jumped up out of her chair. “D-Dipper! I mean Bipper! Y-You’re awake!” She half-yelled, looking startled and just a bit afraid. 

He frowned, cocking his head to the side. “Bipper…?” He said quietly, confused. “Mabel, it's me…” He started, but trailed off. Was it? He didn't know what ‘Me’ he was referring to. He felt divided, torn, unsure. He realized with start that he didn't know who he was. 

He knitted his eyebrows. His far looked confused and sad. He looked at Mabel, covered and afraid and just wanting answers. 

He heard footsteps starting up the stairs.

“D-Dipper…? Is that...is it you in there…?” Mabel asked, hesitantly. 

“I...I think so. Probably…maybe?” He replied, sounding as unsure as he felt. 

They stared into each others eyes for a moment, neither moving, until the door began to open. 

“Mabel, are they awake? I heard your voi-” Stanford began, halting in his tracks as saw the person sitting up on the bed. 

Mabel smiled. “Yeah. He’s awake.” She said, softly, before running forward and pouncing onto the bed. 

He laughed as he was violently pulled into a hug, wrapping his arms around her - man, it was weird how big he was - and burying his nose in her hair. It felt like it had been ages since he last saw her, far too long...He gripped her tighter, his nails digging into her back and it hurt a bit but she didn't care, she was just glad to have her brother back. They both grinned, her tears wetting his shoulder. 

Mabel sniffled and pulled back, still grinning web through her wet face. “W-what's up with the outfit, Bro-Bro?” She asked with a small laugh. 

He raised an eyebrow, looking down. He was wearing a black button-up, with a white bow-tie and a yellow sleeveless tailcoat. His pants were a pair of black jeans, and he wasn't wearing shoes. 

He shrugged a bit. “I just woke up this way.” He joked, and they both laughed. 

“In just so glad that you’re still you, Dipper…” Mabel said after a moment of silence, wiping at one of her eyes. 

His face fell. 

“I- I’m not sure that I am, Mabel. I still love you and I can say that you’re my sister through and through, but I’m not-” He stopped mid-sentence as Mabel pressed a finger to his lips, a slightly sad smile upon her own. 

“And that’s enough for me.” She murmured, leaning forward to press her forehead against his. 

She was really quite a bit smaller than him now, he noted. Strange. 

A cough from the doorway broke the two out of their moment. Ford stood there, looking a bit lost. 

Mabel giggled and crawled off her kind-of brother, sitting on the bed next to him. He smiled at her for a second, before turning towards Ford. 

“Hiya, Smart Guy.” He said tothe other, a soft expression on his face. 

Ford visibly recoiled at the greeting. A long time ago, Bill had said the exact same thing to him. He shook his head and let out a breath. “Listen, I known that you’re smart, so you must have figured by now that we're not going to trust you right off the bat.” He said, rubbing the ridge of his nose. “Not when we don't know if you’re more Dipper or more Bill.”

The two on the bed both looked solemn for a moment, before Mabel suddenly spoke up. “Hey, what should we call you, anyway? We’ve kind of been using Bipper till now.” She laughed, scratch on the back of her head. 

He laughed too. “Well, I guess that Bipper will work for now. Until we get everything sorted out, at least.” Bipper said, staring over at the window. The moonlight was nearly too bright for his sensitive eyes to take, and he flinched back. 

“Huh? Is everything okay, Di- I mean, Bipper?” Mabel asked, concerned. 

Bipper nodded, turning away from the window. “Yeah, I’m just not used to having physical sensations like this. I can count the individual hairs on your head, Mabel - my eyes are way better than i'm used too.” He explained, rubbing at his eyes. 

Ford was very intrigued by the knowledge. “You meant to say you have super-human senses, Bipper?” He asked, stepping forward despite himself. 

Bipper nodded, moving his hand to look up at Ford. “Yeah. I can hear a lot, too. Come to think of it, I can actually hear you guys’ heartbeats.” He said, looking over at Mabel’s chest for a moment. “Everything is really loud if I focus on it, but it's okay if I try to keep it out of mind.”

Ford nodded thoughtfully. The scientist in hi really couldn't resist this, and he started to make some notes on the back of an old, half-used notepad. 

It was a shaky start, and Ford still didn't trust Bipper at all - but it was the start of Bippers new life. Or perhaps, he wondered - 

Maybe his first life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is unedited haha and it's midnight but w/e. 
> 
> If you see any spelling nostakes, feel free to point them out. 
> 
> If you have any urge to talk to the author, in always accepting messages over at my timblr, PhantomHiveOfBees.


	3. First Steps

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bipper takes his first steps into his new life.

It took another two days to get Bipper out of bed. It turns out, after violently being pulled into existence, it was three days before he woke up at all - and Mabel had refused to leave his side the entire time. 

At first, Stan and Ford were worried about her staying up there alone with him - “Bill is in there Mabel, he cannot be trusted!” - but they were both weak to the sniffling face of the little girl. She shouted and cried, saying that she wasn't there for her brother the day that it happened, and she wasn't leaving his side until he was doing well again. 

The first day he woke up, Bipper attempted to get out of the bed - but quickly found that his legs couldn't hold him. He stumbled and fell, nearly knocking Mabel over with one of his flailing wings. Stan had to be called upstairs so that him and Ford could lift the demon back into bed. 

Bipper chuckled in an embarrassed way. “Hey Grunkle Stan…” He muttered, as two pairs of strong hands grabbed his shoulders and ankles and lifted him onto the bed. 

“Hey, Kiddo.” Stan said, sounding only slightly unsure. “Not holding up so well, huh?” 

Bipper laughed. The room became a bit less tense after that, both Stan and Ford seeming to loosen up a bit. 

The next two days was mostly just him and Mabel, since she seemed to be the only one who trusted him right now. He was fine with that - he understood that he was hardly trustworthy.

That didn't stop it from hurting a little bit when he saw Mabel flinch as he called her ‘Shooting Star’. He tried to avoid the nickname after that, but it still snuck out every now and then. 

Mabel brought him food a couple times, but couldn't eat too much of it. Liquids sat with him a bit better, but still made his stomach a bit upset. It was only natural, he supposed - his stomach was only three days old. But it did make him wonder where everything was going - he never had to use the toilet in either way. 

To fill the time, Mabel told him about everything that had happened after he came into existence. At the absence of a leader, all of the demons poured back through the dimensional rift, and the town was left in shambles - but the people were relatively okay. There were only a couple losses. At that point she had to stop and assure him that yes, Wendy and Soos were both alright - and so was Candy, Grenda, and Pacifica. 

Ford was quick to shut the rift, and the town had already began on damage control. But no one could figure out how to get rid of the Weirdness Bubbles, and some people were still stuck as living inanimate objects. 

\--- --- --- 

The two days he spent in bed were ridiculously boring for Bipper. He wasn't capable of sleep, so he spent all night awake, listening to Mabel’s quiet breathing. Now that he was semi-functional, she had moved back into her own bed. 

He did a lot of thinking those two nights. 

He had quite a lot to think about. 

Was he merely a compilation of two beings, crushed together? Were his thoughts only unified due to their immensely tried for each other?   
Or was he something else, an entirely new being born of two others thoughts and feelings and memories, compressed and formed into something new…?

He was pulled out of his thoughts by sunlight coming through the window. He could hear some birds beginning to chirp and sing outside. 

A soft smile slipped into his face. Whatever was happening with him, at least he still had this - Gravity Falls. As amusing and mysterious and beautiful as ever. 

As he thought back on some particularly fond memories, he didn’t notice for a moment as began to float upwards. He did notice when his head bumped in the ceiling, though.

“Wh-wha…?” Bipper started, looking down at the bed beneath him. He wiggled and turned about in the air, but try as he might, he couldn't come down. 

“Uhh, Mabel? Mabel? Shooting Star, wake up, I need your help.” He called across the room, wiggling about and attempting to turn right-side up again. 

Mabel groaned and rolled over, turning to investigate the noise. “Dipper, what's up…?” She questioned, still half asleep. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, before finally realizing what was going on. She snorted and began to laugh, rolling off her bed and into the floor. 

Bipper groaned. “Ughh, Mabel! Now’s not the time for laughing, Mabel! Help me get down!” He crossed his arms over his chest, but it did little to make him lol more serious, considering that he was still floating upside-down. 

Mabel, still giggling and snorting, crawled across the floor and clambered into Bippers’ bed. She stood slowly, and Bipper reached a hand down to grab hers. 

It took quite a bit of pulling and jerking, but she eventually managed to pull him down and onto the bed. Once he made contact with something solid, he immediately ceased floating. 

The sudden onrush of gravity startled him, and he fell forward - landing right on top of Mabel. 

They were both stunned for a moment. Then, Mabel started giggling again. And Bipper, too, was lost on the comedy for a moment. He rested his forehead on the ground next to her head, and they both just sat there and laughed for quite awhile. 

“You’re, haha, heavy, Bip - haha.” Mabel said eventually, still laughing a bit. 

Bipper smiled and rolled over, his tail curling around one of her legs as he stared up at the ceiling. 

It was quiet for a moment. 

 

“...I’m going to need help getting into bed again, aren't I.” Bipper said quietly, after laying on the floor for another three minutes. 

And Mabel started laughing again. 

He rolled his eyes, chuckling just a bit himself. He wondered if he could maybe...‘All right, you can do this Bipper…’ he thought, focusing on his body. Slowly, he started to float off the ground. He went up and up, slowly going from laying-down to standing-up position, until his head was at just an inch higher than it would be were he standing on the ground. Mabel watched curiously from where she was lying in the ground. 

Bipper slowly lowered himself down until his feet touched the ground. Steadily he placed more and more weight on his legs, until -  
“Mabel! I'm standing!” He yelled excitedly, grinning at her. 

“Woo!” Mabel cheered, clapping her hands in excitement. She hopped up and ran over to the door, tossing it open. “Grunkle Stan, Grunkle Ford! Come look! Bipper’s standing up!” She yelled out the door, a big grin on her face. 

Her happiness was infectious.   
Bipper, too, bore a big grin and his uncles showed up in the doorway. 

Cautiously, he lifted one leg and moved it slowly forward. Then the other. Then again. 

He did it -   
He was walking!


	4. New/Old Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LIVE

It took about an hour and a half for Bipper to be steady enough to walk down the stairs. Thankfully, the tail was helping him keep balance very well, and the claws on top of his wings were very good at catching him when he started to fall over - although, looking at the new claw-shaped holes in the wall, Stan might not agree that that’s a good thing. 

Mabel was there with him the whole time, cheering him on from the top of the stairs. Stan stood at the bottom, hoping to catch him if he fell too bad. 

Bipper was grateful for the support. He had been worried that everyone might be against him - that their fear of Bill would make them fear - or, it hurt to even think - possibly hate him. But Mabel, Stan, and Ford all seemed genuinely happy at his accomplishment - although Ford was still, understandably, a bit uneasy. 

“You’re almost there, you’re almost there!” Mabel chanted from the top of the stairs, bouncing up and down. Bipper let out a breathy giggle, taking one more shaky step down. He grinned as he took the last step, planting his foot onto the creaky wooden flooring. He looked up at Mabel, his face split wide with a smile. She grinned and cheered, running down the steps to stand beside him. 

“You did it, Bipper!” Mabel yelled, still clapping. Bipper leaned against the wall and let out a sigh of relief, trying to will his legs to stop shaking. He stretched out one wing and pulled Mabel in for a hug, leaning over and burying his face into her hair. She seemed startled for the barest moment, before grinning even wider as she pressed her face into his side and wrapped her arms around him. 

Ford, who was slowly walking down the stairs himself, trailed his eyes on the sharp wing-tip claw hovering just over Mabel’s shoulder. He wanted to trust Bipper, he really did - he loved his niblings dearly and this was his own fault after all - but, he knew Bill. He’d been tricked by him before and Heaven knows it could happen again. He’d hate find out at a later date that there really wasn't any Dipper left at all, and it had all been a great big con. Ford shuddered at the thought, taking his last step off the stairs. 

But looking at them now - so genuinely happy together, with their little accomplishments - he couldn't help but give a small smile. Sure, he had worries - but for now, at least, they deserved this happiness. They deserved each other. 

He could only hope this happiness was real. 

 

\--- --- --- --- --- --- ---

The walk to the living room was easy, now that Bipper had braved the stairs. He walked side by side with Mabel, taking comfort in her presence. His swirl of emotions over everything was still a confusing mess, and he wasn't really sure how he felt about most things, but...He loved Mabel, and he knew that for sure. His emotions concerning his “uncles” were too confusing to work out just yet, though. There were a lot of things he still needed to think about. 

When Mabel led him into the living room, Bipper suddenly found himself staring at two very familiar faces. 

Shocked, he halted, his wings flaring slightly behind him. “Wendy…Soos...” He murmured, battered by even more conflicting feelings. He stared, open-mouthed, unsure of what to feel or think. 

Mabel walked In front of him, smiling up all the while. “It's okay if you don't know what to say at first. I made sure to explain things to them before bringing you down here!” She said, grinning at him. 

“Sops, Wendy, meet Bipper! Bipper, although you remember them you haven't really met them yet, so, meet Soos and Wendy!” Mabel introduced them happily, backing off once she was done. 

The three stood in silence for a moment. They stared at him, and he stared back. After a while, though, he found his voice again. 

“H..Hello.” Bipper said, stepping forward and reaching out his hand. A handshake seemed...appropriate. 

Sold started to reach for his hand, but stopped in the middle, taking a good hard look at Bipper. Then he smiled and shook Bipper's hand, earth in his voice as he said, “Nice to meet you, Bipper. And welcome back.” 

Bipper’s nervous smile became a real one, a single tear running down his cheek. His tongue slipped out and caught it before it could drip, but he didn't seem to notice. 

He turned to Wendy, still holding his arm out. His smile seemed nervous once again. 

Wendy stared at him, unsure. She looked down, back up, down again. She clenched her fist on her pants android it her lip, then released them. She looked up again. “You really are...someone new, aren't you?” She said, quietly. Bipper stared off to one side, nodding slowly. His smile fell. He looked back, more nervous this time. 

“You’re...not our Dipper. But you’re, well you’re not Him either, so…” Wendy paused, taking a deep breath. “So…” She stilled again, just for a moment. A decision. She gave a small, unsure smile. “Let’s try to be friends, yeah?” She took his hand, shaking it. The tension in the room seemed to melt. 

The conversation from there wasn't exactly easy, but it was...calm. It was the soft blooming of new friendship. They talked for well over an hour, Soos and Wendy recounting what they had been up to during the apocalypse.

The Stans, too, joined in on the conversation after a while. They all talked and laughed and smiled and, for a short time, they all felt...like a family again. 

Bipper, in this time, felt a strong happiness. Sure, he was confused and disoriented, and he kind of in a way still hated some of these people - but he loved them, too. And right now that love was taking the lead and he was fine with that. 

He would take time to think about everything later - for now, he had this. And surrounded by smiling faces and the warm glow of happiness, he wondered if maybe this was all he needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow this update took a long-ass motherfucking time. Sorry ‘bout that. 
> 
> Anyway. Any suggestions for a new name? Because this one sucks haha. 
> 
> Also - a little spoiler-ish here perhaps, but before anyone asks I’d like to say that a lot of Bipper’s personality traits have yet to form, and he is mostly acting on individual reactions from his two parts. And because these parts are drastically different and therefore fighting, he is mostly just standing around unsure of what to do. I want to try and blend their personalities more and more into a single being as time goes on. On any note, he will get less boring and indecisive in a couple chapters, haha. 
> 
>  
> 
> ALSO AGAIN - Any fanfic that i get to use the word 'niblings' in is a good fanfic. *tears of joy* ((For anyone that doesn't know, Nibling/Niblings is the gender-neutral term for Niece/Nephew.))


	5. Something Off, Something New

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something is off with Bipper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Self harm warning.

It’s dark by the time Bipper gets back up the stairs, and into bed. The day was long, and victorious - but he had a certain unease about him. 

Most of the day had been fine, great even. He had gone up and down the stairs, met - re-met? - some friends, and got to eat at the table for the first time. He had said goodnight to Mabel - who seemed to think everything was going just fine - and now lay In bed, wondering why he felt so uneasy. 

Nothing has gone wrong, and yet...he was irate. He felt on-edge, like something horrible was going to happen. 

...Nothing did. 

Days came and went, and four days later, he still felt...off.   
Could he really say he felt off, when he didn't know how he felt normally? 

But still, the feeling was there - persistent, uncomfortable. Something was off. He did well to hide it - he knew the moment he toed the line, Stanford would figuratively lose his shit. Or maybe even literally. He chuckled at the thought, only barely remembering to keep his voice down. Shooting Star wouldn’t be too happy if he woke her up at seven in the morning. The sun was just rising, illuminating all the dust particles in the air.

It was odd to see them In such great detail - he still wasn’t used to it. The more human half of his memories obviously couldn't see this well, and the demonic half, although it could, never bothered looking. He had had better things to do than stare at the intricacies of the physical plane. Like trying to take over the physical plane.

Bipper chuckled, thinking of how downhill THAT venture had went. It was fun while it lasted, but there were a lot of things he had done wrong. He thought about all the ways he could have done better….

His breath caught in his throat. 

Ill. He felt ill, sick, nauseous - he ran to the bathroom, stumbling the whole way, and collapsed onto his knees in front of the toilet. He threw it open, gagging, tail thrashing behind him. 

He gagged and gagged, but nothing came out. He gasped for breath, slobber trailing down from his mouth to the toilet. His eyes were wide with panicked realization. 

He had...he had looked back on that mess fondly. He’d LIKED the destruction. His mind felt torn, excitement and hatred and disgust all mixed together. He was panicking, breathing heavy as eyes wild. 

All of a sudden, a soft voice came from the doorway. 

“Di- mmm, Bipper? What’s up…?” Mabel rubbed her eyes, standing in the doorway wearing a nightgown. 

Bipper looked up, drool covering his chin and neck. He had to tell her. Tell her that he’s dangerous, tell her to get Stanford, to cast him away - 

Bipper gave a small, weak smile. “Dinner didn't agree with the new body too well.” He mumbled. He put one hand on his stomach, the other still gripping the toilet seat. 

“Oh, that’s too bad. Want me to stay, bip-bop?” Mabel asked, her sentence broken in the middle by a yawn. 

Bipper shook his head, turning back to the toilet. 

“Okay then...Night, Bipper…” Mabel murmured as pulled the door shut. 

Bipper stared at his reflection in the water below. It was as unfamiliar as the storm of emotion inside of him. 

He - They - had never felt so conflicted before. Half of him wanted horrible things, craved pain and destruction - the other was scared, yet determined to fight to stay good. Bipper felt like a battleground, two sides warring for control. 

Bipper fell back against the bathtub, unable to look at himself anymore. Was that all he was? A vessel for two souls that weren't his own? Was he even a person, or just a rotten amalgamation of two separate minds who were too weak to form their own words yet? 

He clawed at his face and his arms, feeling like a parasite and its host all at once. His breath came in harsh gasps, tears stinging in his eyes. 

Bipper was having a panic attack. 

His wings scrabbled at the walls, talons cutting the paint to ribbons. His face and arms were wet with blood. Blood pooled in his mouth from where he had bit his tongue. He was hyperventilating, and his mind screamed at him an unending chant - AM I REAL AM I REAL AM I REAL AM I REAL AM I REAL AM I REAL AM I R-

The door was pushed open. 

“HOLY FUCK!” Stanley yelled, stepping back into the hallway. The shouted expletive and sudden appearance were just shocking enough to pull Bipper out of his quickly sinking subconscious. He paused, right hand on his face with the nails sunken in, the talons on his wings each buried into the wall. 

For a moment, everything was silent. 

And then Bipper started sobbing, his entire body shaking with his heaving breaths. “Gr-u-u-u-nk-le Sta-a-annnnnn….” He cried, speech broken and shaky. 

Stan looked around the hallway for backup he didn't have. What the Hell was he supposed to do in this situation? Unsure, he stepped into the bathroom, ignoring the blood that soaked into his slipper. “Heyyy, uhh, buddy, kid...what the heck is going on here?” He tried, pushing the door mostly shut behind him. He left it cracked, just in case. 

Bipper hiccupped and sobbed again, pulling his nails from his face. Streams of blood trickled from the holes, and poured in steady rivulets from the many scratches on his arms. “I...I don't kn-know if I'm a, a person…” He said, quietly, breath and words stuttering. “Am, am, am I r-real? Stan, am I even a p-person? Am I a, a m-monster?”

Stan stared down at the boy, mouth open, and was shocked. He knew the kid must have had some identity problems to work out, but this? “Ohhhhh boy…” He muttered, pushing the door closed behind him. He slowly sat himself down on the edge of the bathtub, heaving a heavy sigh. 

“Listen, kid. You know I'm no good at pep talks. You’re a complicated guy, all right? Now, I know a thing or two about having to figure yourself out - obviously not in a situation as bad as yours, but hey, give me some credit - and this stuff takes time, all right?

“It's not going to be easy. But yes, you are a person. A very new one, who doesn't get to have all the squishy baby years to figure himself out in. You came into this world with a lot of memories, and a lot of feelings for things - but you know what? You didn't feel a damn one of those yourself. You're a new man, Bipper. As much as i’d love to get my nephew back, don't just try to be a person your not. You gotta make yourself, and it's gonna take awhile - but you’ll get it done. And you’ve gotta do it on your own, yeah, and it's gonna be hard - but this ain't something you can just trust those two that seem like they're in your head on. They’re...aw, fuck, y’know, they’re gone for good now. You’re Bipper now. So go make something of it.” 

Stan stood up with a groan, rubbing his back, and looked over at Bipper, who was staring up at him in awe. “I know I'm never getting my nephew back, and it hurts, all right? It hurts. But I have a new nephew now, and I'm gonna make the most of that, ya baby.” He said, with a tired smile, and ruffled Bippers hair. “I’d stay to help you get cleaned up, but it seems like those wounds of your fixed themselves up while I was yammerin’ on. And I'm too old to washing puke off a boy with a better back than me, so I’ll just leave you to wash it off.”

Bipper pulled himself off the ground and struggled to his feet, as Stan headed for the door. He could tell he had a lot of thinking to do. Stan paused in the doorway, hesitated for a moment, then looked over his shoulder at Bipper. 

“And hey...Welcome to the family, ya crazy kid. Don't forget to scrub the floor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I FUCKING LIIIIVVVVVEEEEE!!!!
> 
> Also this is supposed to be angst but I, apparently am incapable of ending a chapter on a bad note. *shrugs* 
> 
> Anyway here is the dawn of Bipper not being a boring little fuck. 
> 
> Still taking new name suggestions, btw. And sorry for how long this took, I blame my depression.


	6. Wild Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The woods are dark, and strange.

It is dark, and Bipper can't see anything but the closest trees around him. It worries him, this all-consuming darkness - normally, he could see through the darkest of nights with his heightened senses. This darkness, though, is different. It’s thick, palpable - it smells of magic, pine, and hints of...oregano? He shakes his head. He has to find out where he is. 

Bipper looks down, and squints at the ground. He can just barely make out his own naked legs. “Why am I naked…?” He murmurs, glancing around. Come to think of it, he has no idea how he came to be in the woods at all. 

Bipper sinks his claws into the soft, damp ground, and feels pine needles press into his palms. He stands, grabbing onto the tree he was leaning against to pull himself up. He looks at his hand just as he starts to move it, and pauses. His skin looks...rather grey. The tree, too, is in shades of grey. Bipper looks around his small circle of visibility, at the misty grey ground and the too-tall pine trees, and feels a sense of impending dread wash over him. 

Bipper moves cautiously forward through the trees, moving at a half-run and trying to watch all around him as he goes. He does not feel safe here. The air is devoid of life - there are no bugs, no birds, no squirrels or mice. There is only the plants, and the feeling that every single inch of this place is out for his blood. There’s not a single sound aside from his feet landing on the fallen debris. It continues like this for what feels like hours - him moving at a quick pace, trying to be quiet, but feeling constantly watched. His heart pounds in his chest and his tail curls around his leg nervously. 

Bipper slows down when he notices a light ahead, faint and blue. It's the only color he’s seen so far - an exit, perhaps? Or a trap, the more cynical part of his mind supplies, but he pushes the thought away. It's the only hope he’s had yet, the only break of the bleak and repetitive norm, so he’s not gonna abandon it. 

Bravely, cautiously, he presses on. 

The trees part to reveal a large clearing, circular and about forty feet wide in all directions. It is bathed in a medium, electric-blue light that gets brighter the closer to the center of the the clearing. Now without the supernatural darkness blocking them, Bipper’s eyes begin to take in all of the little details again. The edge of the clearing is unnaturally straight - a perfect circle of oaks and pines and bushes, but not a single plant inside the clearing aside from the grass. 

Bipper looks to the center of the clearing, and finds the source of the light - a clump of glowing blue mushrooms covered in little white spots, varying from two inches to three feet in height. In the center of the group of fungi is a pool of liquid - Bipper can't make it out clearly from where he’s at, but it's a very reflective liquid, whatever it is. He edges cautiously closer to the pool, and when he doesn't immediately find himself under attack, edges closer some more. 

Slowly Bipper makes his way across the clearing, until he’s halfway across the to the center. Just as he’s about to be close enough to see into the pool - 

“-pper, get off the ceiling silly! Bipper? Hello, can you hear me? ...Bipper?”

Bipper wakes with a start, the ceiling less than an inch from his face. He flails, confused, and slams both of his wings and both of his arms upward - straight into the ceiling. He abruptly stops floating, and falls down onto his bed with all the grace of a dead cow. He lands on his side, too close to the edge - and down he falls, toppling off onto the floor. 

Mabel, who had been standing there trying to bring him down for breakfast, gets slapped by one of his wings and goes down as well, landing on the floor directly beside him. 

“W-w-woah!” She shouts, sitting upright. “Bro are you alright? Bipper?”

Bipper presses his hands to his face and sits up slowly, letting out a low groan. He curls his wings in close and looks over to his sister, a sheepish smile on his face. “Sorry, Mabel. I think I was having a nightmare.” He apologizes, rubbing the back of his neck.

Try as he might, though, he cannot remember what he was dreaming about. 

“Is everything okay up here?” Comes a voice from the doorway. 

The twins look up to see Stan in the hallway, slippers on and a cup of coffee on his hand. He looks unamused and vaguely perplexed. 

“We’re fine Grunkle Stan, don’t worry! Bipper just took a tumble is all. We’ll be down for breakbeat in just a sec!” Mabel says with a grin. Stan shakes his head, and wanders back down the stairs. Bipper notices just the barest hint of a smile on his face. 

“Wanna talk about that nightmare, Bipper-ony?” Mabel asks him once their Grunkle leaves, placing a hand on his arm. Her hands feel so small, now. 

Bipper shakes his head, floating up just high enough to get his legs under himself. His tail wraps around Mabel's middle and lifts her up until she’s in her feet. “No thanks, Mabes, I’m good. I can't actually remember it now, to be honest.” He chuckles, brushing off the seat of his pants. 

Mabel giggles as she’s lifted up, settling into her feet before giving her brother a hug. “Well, alrighty then. But don't hesitate to tell me if you need to talk about anything!” 

She dashes off down the stairs, bouncing all the way. Bipper laughs and grins, forever amazed at her boisterousness. He wanders over to the doorway. 

And there he pauses, for just a moment, to look over his shoulder. And through the window he see’s, for barely a second, blue light pouring in. 

But is gone as fast as he saw it, and he blinks the image out of his eyes. There’s really no reason for the light to be blue, he thinks, tapping his nails on the doorframe. He shakes his head and starts down the stairs, wondering idly why he woke up smelling pine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey holy shit I didn't die, it's a miracle. 
> 
> Anyway here's a new chapter, it's super late. Hopefully I'll manage to pump out a number seven before I recluse into the woodwork again?
> 
> Also, there's a really weird reference buried early on in this chapter. If you can tell me what I'm referencing I will personally allow you to request one thing for me to add in to this fic, within reason.   
> ((You have to be the first of course, haha.))


	7. Oh Deer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bipper sees a Deer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eyyyyy sorry it’s short. I’m a person with depression so writing is hard. 
> 
> Anyway, I still love this story I’m just slow. Slight gore warning for this one, doesn’t get too into it - but definitly a sign of things to come.

Bipper wakes up, panting, the scent of pine heavy in his lungs. He feels a heavy weight on his chest and nearly throws it, but catches himself just in time. 

Movie night. Yeah. 

He’s laying on the couch, the ending credits of some B-horror movie are playing by on the screen, and Mabel’s asleep on him. 

Bipper looks around the room, and everything’s as it was before he fell asleep - the Stan’s asleep on the loveseat, Ford with a still-open book in his lap. Wendy dozing in Stan’s recliner, half-empty popcorn bucket clutched to her chest like a teddy bear. Bipper lets out a slow sigh of relief, as everything appears to be fine. Why was he so terrified? Why does he keep waking up scared, smelling pine? 

He tries as hard as he can, but there’s nothing he can recall about whatever dream he was having. It's gone, like the last time this happened, and the time before. Gently, he moves to stand up, shifting Mabel onto the couch as he does. She murmurs in her sleep, but doesn't awaken. 

Bipper walks out the back door, and sits down on the porch. Pine, pine...what significance is the pine smell? He feels at a loss, like there’s something he should be doing with this information, like there’s something he should research about it - what though? And where? Not remembering your nightmares is hardly a phenomenon. 

But there’s some feeling, deep inside, telling him that he absolutely knows where he’s going in his dreams, and he just needs to remember it. He has to remember it. 

Bipper rests his head on his knees, his wings drooping to his sides. There’s that empty feeling gain, deep inside. He feels like a puzzle missing some of its pieces. Just five or six, here and there, but noticeable - the picture is understandable but hardly whole. 

He breaths deep, and the cold night air smells of oak and maple and it stings his lungs with their fullness. He thrums his nails on the porch boards and he thinks back to what Stan told him and realizes that he has to make a choice. 

He has to choose to make himself his own person. 

 

Bipper stands up, and he runs. 

He runs into the woods, into the wild - he breathes and he breathes and keeps on breathing, heart thrumming to the rhythm of his steps. He laughs and he twirls and he throws his arms open and listens as trees all around him creak and groan with the force of his magic. 

He throws himself backwards and floats, staring up at a star-filled night sky. He takes a deep breath and he holds it, taking in the wonder of the galaxies. 

And, for the first time in his measly, short life - he stops thinking about he was or who he might become, or what others will think of him if he’s too much like one parent soul or the other. He stops thinking, and starts feeling. 

Feeling like himself, finally. 

Feeling wild, untamed in his raw power and might. 

Feeling...hungry. 

Bipper chuckles. He flips, and floats along through the woods with his arms dangling beneath him, wings still, up and posed as of mid-flap. His long, elf-like ears twitch and swivel, and he follows his gut and his senses, onward to the unknown. Ahead of him he sees a spot of heat in a work of cold, a large shape with four legs. 

A long, forked tongue slips past his lip and he salivates. He reaches out one arm, just as the deer looks up to stare at him. 

And there it stands, stock still, as he floats up to it. He giggles and clenches his fist, hearing a swift crunch followed by a low, slick slide - teeth fly around the deer and outwards, as it stands frozen in place. 

“You won’t feel a thing, I promise…” Bipper hisses, quietly, meaning it in full. The deer stats still, unonowinging, as it’s demise floats ever closer, discarding the teeth and heading for a warm, red prize…

 

Bipper wakes to harsh, warm sun in his eyes - and a soft, wet bed around him. He blinks into consciousness slowly, blearily opening his eyes to see a cloudless sky above. He smiles for a moment, before the confusion sets in. Why is he outside? And why is he...sticky?

Sitting up, Bipper first notices that his stomach is moderately distended, not enough to be overly noticeable, but just enough to be uncomfortable. His next realization is that he’s covered in blood, surrounded by bones, and sitting in a pile of organs and deer skin. 

 

He’s too busy screaming and flying into the air to notice the multitude of similar piles, scattered around under the nearby trees.

**Author's Note:**

> sorrynotsorry
> 
> I just really like demons okay i just want to write about demons.
> 
> So um, comment if you like please. Comments give me drive to write things haha. 
> 
> Also! this fic will probably be a bunch of smaller chapters. 
> 
>  
> 
> And hey, if you wanna chat with me or something, my tumblr is PaintedDoll. I am always open to asks or IM's. ^^ even if you're just complaining about how slow I am at updating haha.


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